Holiday Gift Guide!

Dave Barry usually does a Holiday Gift Guide filled with ridiculous, yet hilarious gift ideas.

We are proud to inform you that over a year ago we discovered his #1 gift idea, Flair Hair. Yes, that’s right. We gifted this a year before Dave Barry.  We’ve been offered the official seal of Hilarious People.

As such, our family decided to make our own Holiday Gift Guide to make our readers aware of weird, funny, and unusual items we’ve discovered.Plus, according to Amazon, there are only 7 shopping days left if you hope to score free shipping.

Before I get into a list of gift ideas that our family found hilarious, two items on Dave’s list this year must be mentioned.

To my chagrin, people all over the world find our website because of the following words: “Sound Proof Underwear.”

Granted, Sam hopes to offer a patent on such a project sometime soon, but given that his lab consists of Legos, it might be awhile.

I felt horrible not having solutions for people who want sound proof underwear.

So I offer up the ODOR PROOF BLANKET!  It’s actually called The Better Marriage Blanket – the mission being to save spouses from the silent but deadly forces following good cooking.  It’s my understanding that this company hasn’t cracked the sound thing yet.

Pillow Tie.  A tie that turns into a pillow. Seriously.  You have to look at this website with your kiddos.  Give it a little while to flip through the cartoons of people using it.  Giggles will follow.

Now onto our gift guide:

*Disclaimer* Not a paid advertisement. We don’t guarantee anything, and have never ordered these items or bought things from these stores.  We just like to laugh.

I don’t know about you, but our homemade pizzas are out of this world.  If you have a friend or loved one who consistently produces pies that make you exclaim, “oh my!” then you need a pizza cutter that will take you where no man has gone before.  That’s right, the Star Trek Enterprise Pizza Cutter. It’s an officially licensed Star Trek Collectable.  We hope it’s built solidly enough to last long and prosper.

It’s not a Star Wars umbrella. It’s called a Blade Runner Style LED Umbrella.  But come on. It looks like a light saber.  And I think having the option of having a glowing weapon-looking thing, while walking on dark rainy nights, is pretty awesome.

I imagine the following scene: walking in a dark parking lot, alone, trying to get to your car in the rain, when you spot an unsavory looking person.  You flip on the light beam. There’s no way he’ll think it’s a light saber… unless… you casually let your hand drift upward and howl in pain when it touches the glowing beam. You mutter to yourself, “Have to remember not to touch it!”  The drama might possibly buy you enough time (Wait. Does that thing really work? Or is she mentally unstable? I better stay away… just in case) to get you safely to the car.

You’re in awe of my imagination.  I can tell.

Etch a Sketch Ipad Case.  We just thought this rocked.

And last, but not least, my favorite.  Unfortunate Cookies.  We had found other versions of the same idea, but were disappointed when the description said not for kids, and explicit.  This, however, says they’ve avoided such content, and if you want to be sure, they’ll even let you pick which fortunes you want out of their funny database!  Watch the commercial:

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