My plans to carve pumpkins and perform Steve Spangler chemistry experiments last night completely derailed.

For one, the children were in trouble. We all understand Monday mornings — that’s why everyone can relate to the song, “It’s just another manic Monday…”

Yet when it happens every week, along with bad attitudes, and chores left undone, combined with a hefty dose of disrespect… well, privileges don’t hang around for that kind of behavior.

Besides that, as the evening wore on, hot tea, vitamin C, and a humidifier were becoming my new best friends.

Mike joined my grumpiness on the couch, and Sam and Anabelle informed us they had extra credit homework for P.E..  Thirty minutes of exercise. Done enough times, these thirty minute sessions would earn them each unlimited laser tag passes.

Did they want to go outside?  No.

Did they want to try Mom’s yoga? No.

They wanted to invent their own exercise program. As a former aerobics instructor (read: years and 20 lbs. ago), my heart beamed with pride.

They handed me a timer to keep track, and proceeded to explain each exercise move….

Anabelle explains that this is The Show Off Move.  Start with one elbow up, and one hip out.

Now begin to walk or run with attitude and giggles.

This is called Telephone Trouble.  Anabelle says you pretend that you’re talking to someone you really don’t want to talk to and just want to get off the phone so you shake your arm a lot.

I’m hoping this wasn’t inspired by me hanging up the phone after the third time of saying no to a certain telemarketer who was STILL saying, “but ma’am….”

Exercise moves not shown:  The Tantrum (lay on your stomach and bang your fists and legs rapidly on the floor while trying not to giggle), the Football Run (run in slow motion, dramatically, as if coming out onto a field of adoring fans).

Repeat several times until exhausted.

I think they burned just as many calories laughing as they did moving.

They’re thinking of releasing an Exercise DVD.

If tonight goes well, I really, really, want to make this for handing out trick or treat candy!

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